M-
You have been my best friend for years now. I have grown to love you and your children. You are my chosen family and closer, in more ways than proximity, to me than my God given family.
It has been a minute since we last spoke. Our recent silence has been difficult yet very necessary for my continued growth; as well as yours. I pray that I can make this clear to you.
I love, accept and respect me. As such, I set and adhere to certain standards and boundaries in my life. Integrity and Wisdom mandate that all that are in my circle of influence do the same.
In love, acceptance, and respect of self; I am able to fully love, accept and respect you. I know that you are incredibly sensitive. This makes it harder for me to communicate with you openly and honestly at times. I don’t want to be the cause of any discomfort to you. The problem with that is this fact, sometimes growth is accompanied with discomfort or pain. This is why we call them “growing pains”.
My sister, I pray that you will take my words in the spirit in which they were written. You are my friend and I want you to stand in power and claim all of the love, joy, and blessings with which God has gifted you.
I have watched for years now as you continue to relinquish your power and gifts. I have watched as you have purchased the table, the food, prepared the bountiful feast, served your guests first, and only saved for yourself the unconsumed crumbs. I have watched as you have given all of the love you have to someone that has demonstrated a total lack of love for you or your children. This person has been allowed the unearned privilege of sitting in the guest of honor seat at your feast; when with proper perspective, their consistent behavior has not warranted them even an invite. This person has seen you struggling and hurting under this burden and refused to change courses and offer love or assistance, as a fellow human being, at the very least.
You may not know this, but I have cried thinking of the message that your daughter is subconsciously cataloging and physically reenacting, already. As you have shared my son’s views- that he can freely share with you- I have shared your daughter’s views with you. I gleaned that you misread my vocal sense of urgency as judgment. Consider if you will the steep price you both are paying as a result of your fear to move forward in faith?
I love you and cannot watch you hurt yourself, silently. I cannot give you anymore than I have already. All that you need to move forward victoriously, you possess already. You are “it”- “it” is not outside of you, “it” is within. Love, accept, and respect “it”. “It” will empower you to live fully.
My sister- I need you. I feel a void in your absence. However, our friendship must be healthy; it is a non-negotiable standard for me. One must be healthy in order to have and be in healthy relationships.
Please don’t take my absence as abandonment. I love you and am content to do so from a distance for now. You should know however, that you are never far from my thoughts and prayers. I miss the blend of our families, laughter, good food, adventures, and fun. Take care of your business sis! Some things only you can do. Do the inner work, and the outer transformation will be a breeze. I will without hesitation have your back and you my assistance with those things with which I can help. TrustJ
SELF LOVE~SELF ACCEPTANCE~SELF RESPECT
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